By: Emma Shipley October 11th, 2023
In the past few years, the grumpy-father-adoptive-kid trope has become more and more popular in all forms of media.
The audience gets to meet a headstrong man used to doing things a certain way and gets thrown into the position of “father”. They struggle with this newfound position, unsure of how they could bring a child through their current conditions. But the glory of it is it leads to compelling character dynamics and, more importantly, wholesome, heartfelt emotional moments.
We’ve seen characters like Hopper and Eleven from “Stranger Things”, Joel and Ellie from “The Last of Us” and even Geralt and Ciri from “The Witcher” be some of the most prominent forms of this trope. But there are, of course, way more examples.
The Mandalorian: Din Djarin and Grogu
2019’s “The Mandalorian” saw The Mandalorian, Din Djarin, care for what the fans deemed “baby Yoda”.
These two quickly became a fan-favorite duo with Din’s apprehension and Grogu’s goofiness. Din was a very reserved individual, only doing the job he was paid for and then hunkering down until he was needed again. When Grogu came into his life, things quickly turned on their head.
While in season 1 they had smaller moments where Din was warming up to having a kid around, by seasons 2 and 3 he had officially taken on the “dad” title.
Dad of the Year Award
We love watching a character get crazy protective over someone, especially if they are a younger character or a loved one. In the show, Din goes through hell and back multiple times to protect this little guy. Whenever Grogu is in immediate danger, Din doesn’t hesitate to throw himself in the line of fire to keep him safe. We see this in season 1 when the guild attacked, in season 2 when he fully dove into the ocean to save him from drowning, and again in season 3 during the finale. All in all, Din does a fantastic job of always ensuring Grogu’s immediate safety.
Why it works
We all have a part in us that wants these close bonds. We want to feel like “it’s us against the world” or “nothing can come between us”. Which is why Din and Grogu’s relationship is so well written.
They bring out the best in each other. Din becomes more open and Grogu becomes braver. Considering they both come from a traumatic past, having these two feel more comfortable around each other is what sells their relationship. Din had trouble trusting many people outside his work or his Mandalorian covert. With Grogu, he has a deeper sense of need than just getting credits from a job. He’s devoted to getting Grogu back to his kind, going out of his way to help different people just to get Grogu where he needs to be. Din is gentle with him and tries to be the proper caretaker for the time being.
Meanwhile, Grogu offers a sense of comfort and purpose. He makes Din laugh, helps him see different perspectives, and helps drive him to be better. The only reason Grogu gets trained in the way of the Mandalore and the Jedi is because he knows he belongs with Din as a Mandalorian foundling.
While Din sometimes feels he isn’t capable of raising a kid, the fact that he chooses to be a father makes his character more lovable and relatable.
And in turn, it makes the two of them seem like together, they could conquer anything the galaxy throws at them.
MARVEL: Tony Stark and Peter Parker
Tony Stark holds the reign as a headstrong, broken, man who’s suddenly forced into a parental role when Peter Parker joins the Avengers. While he’s not as involved as Din Djarin, he’s still actively influencing Peter and doing everything in his power to protect him.
Tony especially does this in Spiderman Homecoming and in Infinity War. While not as prominent in Infinity War, watching a scared 17-year-old disappear in front of your eyes is heartbreaking.
Peter is one of his main reasons for getting everybody who was snapped back to their time.
Protector from Afar
One primary example of Tony’s parentage is having a tracker in his suit. This feature was used in Spiderman: Homecoming after his initial encounter with Vulture and during his fight on the boat. Tony was able to quickly locate him and bring him to safety. Tony really only begins to step in when he knows the kid screwed up.
Before the boat incident, Peter was only given small instructions and wasn’t able to really know Tony. He even complains that if Tony actually cared, he would physically be there instead of somewhere else. Tony’s lecture here is what proves that Tony cares about Peter and just wants him to make the right choices, suit or no suit. In turn, this is what drives Peter to be a better Avenger. To him, disappointing Tony is on the same level as disappointing his Aunt May.
There is also a theory that the reason Tony implemented all these protocols and safety measures was to prevent Peter from going through what he did. Specifically, the GPS tracker was in case he was held hostage somewhere and needed finding. There’s even a theory that since Tony ended up getting stuck in the snow in Iron Man 3, he added a built-in heater in case Peter ever found himself in the cold.
In Infinity War, they are in closer contact with each other. This allows them to grow closer as both heroes and friends. While Peter disobeyed Tony’s orders, in the end, Peter becomes a catalyst for Tony. After losing a war and losing a child, Tony’s pain and regret are highlighted.
Not only was Peter sorry for getting involved, Tony was sorry for letting him get this far.
Why It Works
Peter and Tony have different ways of viewing their heroism but together, they make a proud father-son duo. Tony is obviously interested in his skills and abilities, (see Captain America: Civil War) but soon he becomes interested in who he is as a teenager. Peter offers more comedic relief to the already dry-humored Tony.
The way their relationship is written is that Peter worships Tony, he doesn’t want to disappoint him since he recruited him. At the same time, Tony is afraid of disappointing Peter because of all the problems he gets himself into-leading Tony to decide when Peter can get involved.
In Captain America: Civil War, Tony orders Peter to stay down after injuring himself much to Peter’s protests. While Peter knows he’s strong enough to fight, Tony goes through a mental battle of returning the kid to his aunt every time they’re in high-stakes scenarios.
They balance each other out, making any interaction they have worth watching over and over. They bounce off each other in high-tense scenarios, allowing us to see how they inspire each other and protect each other.
The Sea Beast: Jacob and Maisie
Spoilers for The Sea Beast
The Sea Beast is an animated movie on Netflix from 2022. It follows Jacob Holland and his crew of pirates as they quest to find and kill a legendary sea monster. Along the way, the crew realizes they have their own stowaway aboard. This is where we meet Maisie Brumble, an orphan whose parents were pirates themselves.
Opening a World of Possibilities
Maisie and Jacob have a tough time adjusting to each other at first. After Maisie makes a bold decision that gets them swept away in a storm, it takes a lot for them to regain each other’s trust. The two struggle with seeing the same page.
Maisie believes that the sea beasts need to be left alone while Jacob is avid about hunting them down. They bicker and argue over the course of the movie but towards the middle is where they really begin to accept each other.
Jacob takes up that surrogate family position that she was missing. When Maisie opens his eyes to the possibility that the sea beasts can be gentle creatures, he decides it’s time to put his harpoon away for good.
Jacob and Maisie both show how close they’ve grown over the course of the movie after Maisie becomes injured. Because she was caught in a crossfire between Red and the royal navy, she and Jacob wind up on a ship heading for the mainland with the monster in tow.
Jacob fights his captain while Maisie attempts to free Red. They leave the final battle battered and bruised. Maisie’s speech inspires both civilians and pirates alike to end monster hunting, which allows these two ruffians to be able to live in the countryside.
Why It Works
Maise and Jacob both come from a history of pirating, making them more susceptible to understanding each other. All Maisie wants is a family and all Jacob wants is a sense of stability. We see them fight for these things throughout the movie as Jacob becomes captain and Maisie gets to know the crew.
But this really shines as they travel on the back of Red, the legendary sea beast, to return to the mainland. While they try to kill time, they actually get to know each other and understand their own personal skills. We watch Jacob see the world through a child’s eyes and we understand Maisie’s empathy towards these giant creatures. By this point, the duo finally get to see eye to eye. They realize that the war that’s been happening for centuries was caused by misinformation and prejudice.
Their relationship starts rocky but similar to Din and Grogu, they slowly bring out the best in each other and help change perspectives.
Conclusion
Ultimately, this trope caters somewhat to the inner child in all of us. We all want that sense of belonging, even if it’s not with our immediate family. These “father” figures stand out in particular because they’re not the standard “grumpy dad adopts a child”. They are unconventional “dads” and it heightens their likability. Din Djarin is Grogu’s dad, Tony Stark is a father/mentor, and Jacob acts as an older brother/ caretaker.
In any scenario, having this trope is what resonates with audiences and what makes any pairing under this trope all the more interesting.
